This episode is weird because in its entirety it is among my go-to’s yet it additionally makes my blood boil. This is one of the few times wbelow I want to punch Charlotte York in the confront. It should really be called Ring a Ding Ding Bat.

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The last episode finished via Carrie’s voice over informing us Aidan moved out the following day after their disastrous breakup. This episode begins via Carrie trying to settle her toilet while Aidan is relocating out the last of his stuff. We have the right to now automatically comment on factors why Carrie Bradshaw is the WORST.

#1 – She begs Aidan to remain.

Aidan appropriately tells her he can’t. She cannot give him what he needs but somejust how thinks she deserves him anyway so is selfish enough to ask him to stay when he has actually the last box of his shit ready to go? And she offers him these weepy, Bambi eyes as if that’s meant to change his mind.

#2 – She tells him she left the engagement ring for him on her clvery own table and that he must take it. I hope she remembered to take it off the fucking chain she was wearing it on! He states she have to keep it (but if she did that, this maddening episode wouldn’t exist) yet she insists he take it and also then remains on her bathroom floor for 3 hours after he leaves because…? Who knows. I intend initially it was bereason she couldn’t watch him leave but then to remain there for three hours?? As I asked last episode, are we supposed to feel sorry for her? Since I fucking don’t.

#3 – Aidan has left her a thick envelope that she wrongly assumes it is a goodbye letter. It is actually a letter from the legislation offices of Gold & Vogel basically saying she has actually 30 days to buy back her apartment from Aidan, or vacate so he deserve to market it to someone who actually has money. I have so many type of thoughts.

First of all, did Aidan market to let her save the engagement ring bereason he kbrand-new he was “evicting” her and she has no money so could have actually hocked it for a down payment? Second of all, DID SHE ACTUALLY FUCKING THINK SHE WOULD JUST BE ABLE TO STAY IN THE APARTMENT THAT AIDAN NOW OWNS, RENT FREE? Even giving her the benefit of the doubt, which I hate to carry out, and also she assumes she might just pay him rent, why the fuck would he want to have a landlord/tenant relationship through the worst perkid EVER? Spoiler: he wouldn’t!


#4 – Carrie and also the gals are at brunch while Miranda has to describe the legal record and that Aidan isn’t actually evicting her. Samantha calls it tacky. She means Aidan, yet the tacky one is Carrie!!! Everyone encourages her to buy however Carrie says NYC is a town of renters (other than eexceptionally various other perkid at the table owns their apartment). One nitpick I have actually here is that Carrie points out Charlotte didn’t need to actually PAY for her apartment, Trey simply gave it to her in a settlement. That’s not completely true as we will certainly uncover out next seakid when Bunny informs her that the deed is still in the MacDougal name, no matter what Trey promised.

#5 – Ricdifficult bought Samantha the new Chanel wallet and she admits he’s generous with money, which is Carrie’s signal to switch the conversation to herself to tell them all Aidan wanted her to save the ring, however she couldn’t and it was the best thing to execute. Like she is some kind of fucking martyr.

She asks Charlotte about her engagement ring from Trey and Char states there is no method she’d offer it up. Carrie says there is no method she could save Aidan’s ring because eextremely time she looked at it, it would break her heart. Please. She was going to market it for cash money IMMEDIATELY. But her comment does stick through Charlotte bereason cut to her gaining her engagement ring appelevated and maybe turned right into a necklace. Eventually, she decides she isn’t prepared. (The ring is a 2.17 carat diamond from Tiffany kind of. I googled this and as freshly as 5 years back it would be worth nearly $50,000. For backwards inflation’s sake, let’s assume Charlotte is sitting on a $35,000 ring.)

#6 – Carrie goes to the bank to attempt and acquire a loan to buy her apartment. This scene is especially cringe worthy, for the adhering to reasons:

She has actually $700 in her checking account (BUT SHE JUST PAID HER CREDIT CARD BILL, LINDA, HAVE SOME RESPECT).$957 in savings. ($1,657 in cash + unspecified debt = negative net worth, excellent task girl)She tries to shame Linda, the bank employee, for being single, and also can’t Linda understand also her predicament and do her a solid?She has actually no various other income, however feels the have to suggest out she was NY Magazine’s finest pick for city columnist. As if that is meant to be worth money? Linda is not impressed.She has no assets exterior the bank – no stocks, bonds, residential or commercial property, etc. And then is still all woe is me bereason she can’t get a loan bereason she’s an “undesirable” candidate bereason she’s 35 and also worth nothing.

#7 – She decides to readjust her way of living and also take the bus. Which she does…once, while bitching to some bad lady that when she USED to take the bus it was 75 cents however currently it’s $1,50 and also for $3 even more you could take a cab. SHUT UP. Also, the bus that comes has actually her column ad on it, which provides her feel worse. Good!

#8 – In her voice over while creating her column, she blabbers about just how also though she’s 35 and also single via no financial security, she has actually life suffer and shouldn’t that count? Um, no bitch. Your financial institution is not going to use your assorted fuck ups as monetary collateral. You have actually nothing to show for your previous relationships – attend to it.

#9 – Carrie and Miranda go shoe shopping bereason Miranda’s feet are too bloated to fit right into any type of of her current shoes. Carrie is whining around exactly how she can’t buy any right currently due to her financial predicament yet then asks the sales man to carry her prefer 709 pairs to try on. She insists she is doing this simply for fun and also he shouldn’t let her buy any kind of of them. Lady, this man is not Al Bundy. He actually wants to DO his job. Take your ass to Paymuch less and also attempt on shoes for fun tbelow.

By the means we are not also halfway through this episode and I am already approximately ten factors.

#10 – Still at the shoe keep, Miranda talks around how she’s an unpreferable (gassy, bloated, farting but horny AF) and also Carrie once aobtain switches the convo to herself and also just how SHE is the undesirable because she can’t acquire a loan/mortgage and is legitimately confused around wbelow all her money went.

#11 – Carrie can’t execute fundamental math. To answer her money question, Miranda grabs a shoe and says, “at $400 bucks a pop, how many of these perform you have?” We uncover out it is at leastern 100 and also Miranda points out 400×100 is her down payment. Carrie is all what that’s only $4,000. Um, no Einstein, it’s $40,000, which Miranda points out, and also just at that allude is Carrie horrified.

#12 – Carrie goes to look at other apartments to rent and has nothing however negative points to say about each apartment negative Delia shows her. Delia is no doormat though and also tells Carrie to take her price array and also mindset to Weehauken.

#13 – Her next move is to go see Big at occupational to ask him how to make money quick. I think this article by Kate Erbland sums it up pretty nicely:

Carrie does, ostensibly, ask for financial advice from Big, but her intentions are clear. She desires money to save herself. He gives her acheck.

So yeah she’s all how did you turn $3 million into $100 million? Big is no dummy and also sees through this facade however offers her a $30,000 inspect anymeans. This bitch kbrand-new there was no means she can make the money herself in three weeks and she likewise kbrand-new Big would certainly just give it to her but then she waltzed in trying to cover up her intentions anyway. I’d have actually even more respect for her if she’d simply gone in there and was prefer yo, mama need some cash, spot me bro.

#14 – Out at dinner through the girls, she flashes her down payment check from Big and asks their opinions on whether or not she can/need to take it. Miranda is adamant that she not take it. Samantha has actually the oppowebsite opinion. Charlotte doesn’t want to talk about it. Miranda provides to loan her fifty percent the money instead and Samantha supplies up the rest. Charlotte simply averts her eyes. Carrie proclintends she will certainly perform this by herself and rips up the examine from Big. Please, bitch, you won’t do it by yourself bereason you can’t because you’re the WORST.

Erbland also, when aget, comes out swinging with an extremely valid point:

Charlotte is meant to be the bad guy right here, the shitty frifinish who won’t pony up the cash to her moron friend, even though she’s simply gone via a disastrous divorce andlikewise doesn’t have actually a payingjob.

Although, I will say, she doesn’t appear to NEED a paying job bereason presumably Trey is slipping her cash. I am confused regarding wbelow her money comes from yet she obviously has actually the majority of it.

#15 – Realizing she probably needs to give up her apartment, Carrie goes over to Charlotte’s, unannounced to unload all her frustration and also anger and make her feel guilty for not supplying her the money. She states she wouldn’t have taken it (sure, Jan) and also if the situations were reversed she would certainly have available it to Charlotte…LOL girl you have actually $1,600 to your name, what do you need to market ANYONE?

#16 – Carrie additionally states while she has actually made mistakes, so has actually Charlotte and also Carrie has actually constantly been there to listen and support her (again…LOL. Bitch always finds a method to change the subject back to herself) and also lays right into her for averting her eyes at dinner as soon as the other two girls offered to loan Carrie the money.

#17 – Charlotte points out, RIGHTFULLY, that it is not her task to resolve Carrie’s finances and she demands to learn exactly how to carry out things on her very own. Carrie notices that Charlotte is wearing her engagement ring and chastises her for that too and also how could she tell Carrie to be more independent as soon as she is wearing Trey’s ring? Um, well initially of all she is not begging civilization for $30,000 bereason she’s blvery own all her money on shoes. She’s having a daunting time via her divorce and also is being yelled at by her selfish, awful, dip shit friend who can’t obtain her head out of her own ass to realize various other civilization have actually difficulties too.

#18 – At lunch through Charlotte, Carrie apologies for her little tantrum and also Charlotte ends up offering her the 2.17 rock for her down payment. CHARLOTTE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? Carrie insists she will certainly pay Charlotte back (LOL), takes the ring and also signs her mortgage. I’m sure she appreciated sticking it to Linda, too.

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Carrie’s voice over says some garbage about Charlotte taking her painful past and also turning it in to Carrie’s hopeful future. It’s so ridiculous that Carrie’s guilt pilgrimage tantrum actually functioned and even though it ISN’T Charlotte’s job to deal with Carrie’s finances, she does it anymeans. And it never comes up aacquire so we all recognize Carrie never before passist her ass earlier one cent.

SIDEBAR: Steve mercy fucks the horny, pregnant, gassy, Miranda, returning her kindness that led to sassist pregnancy.

SIDEBAR 2: Rictough is having his assistant buy Samantha a shit ton of presents and she catches on and also ends up manipulating him to say “I love you”. And then she doesn’t fucking say it back. Sounds favor those kids are going to make it.